Understand Your Emotion
Life has its ups and downs, and so does our emotion. Sometimes we feel good and sometimes we feel bad. When bad emotions covered ourselves we need to sort it out and find the root problems, if we never know the root of problems then we will be busy fixing the symptoms not the underlying problem.
We need to understand what we feel because bad emotion is an unclear situation and needs to be understood further, you need to know the source of the bad emotion you have, is it anger, disappointment, sadness, frustration, or being mentally exhausted? Dealing with each emotion has its own method. You cannot deal with sadness the same way you deal with frustration.
We keep distracting ourselves
The common thing people do when they have emotional baggage is distracting themselves. We all acknowledge that distracting ourselves from problems feels good, it gave the sensation of getting rid of the problem without having to do that. Because solving the problem is not easy.
When we have problems we often distract ourselves by keeping ourselves busy like hanging out with friends or trying to forget our problems for a while such as drinking too much alcohol. All of that just to meet again with the problem once you have nothing to distract to.
The thing with running away from the problem is you’re not totally being free of the problem, you just running in the circle until you get tired, and then the problem going to gobble you again. You cannot be free just by running away, the longer you ran from the problem, the longer you are trapped with them in the circle. If you decide to stop and solve it then you will be free from them completely.
Listen to what you feel
Rather than just running away from your problem and distracting yourself from what you truly feel, try to listen to yourself. Spend time with yourself, alone. Listen to your thought, and write down everything you feel and the problems on your mind.
Sometimes when you have problems, you wanna tell your problems to your friends or someone you are close to hoping that they will give you some useful advice or just simply they willing to listen to what you feel. And sometimes you feel relieved after telling others your problem. you feel relieved because you can express your emotion and be able to articulate your problem. and when you articulate your problem somehow you can point out the problems and distinguish the symptoms and underlying problem.
The thing with telling your problems to others is you cannot tell them everything because you might have something uncomfortable to share with them, and it prevents you to figure out the whole problem.
The best way to understand your problem is to tell your problem to yourself through writing and let what you feel be stated on your paper or screen. By doing that you can tell everything without being uncomfortable and if you have written all your problems you might find one-two interesting points that might be the underlying problems.
Find the solution that is best for you
When you articulate your problems, you might find the underlying problems. You know what’s wrong with you and you can find what solution works best for you.
If you cannot figure out what solution is best for you, read a lot of books and seek others’ advice. It helps a lot because you’re not the first person to experience this kind of situation and emotion. Many people before you experienced it and survived somehow.
If you keep struggling with your condition, while others’ advice and books cannot help you, don’t hesitate to ask for professional help.
Your well-being matters because you can’t function normally as a human if one of your body and soul doesn’t in a good condition.
What it means to understand your emotion
To understand better what it means to understand your emotion, imagine you’re failing to be accepted in the last chance for a dream job you keep aiming for the whole life. you feel so mixed about that, you feel so sad and mad at the same time, you may feel more than that, you feel something you cannot express, all you know is you feel so terrible about it. Those emotions keep appearing in your head and you cannot get over them even after a long time.
Bad emotions are like tangled threads, you have to unravel them to understand them. Write everything you feel on paper or on your screen. As you write one by one you might understand what you truly feel.
You may find that you feel mad because the reality doesn’t match your expectations, you feel upset because the effort and sacrifice you made seems to betray you, you feel disappointed because we cannot make the one you love proud of you, and you also feel frustrated because your best wasn’t enough.
Once you notify each emotion then you can fix each emotion using a different approach. if you feel mad because the reality didn’t match your expectations, maybe you have to accept it because you cannot control everything, and you can learn to manage your expectations in the future.
Also if you feel frustrated because your best wasn’t enough, maybe you should stop blaming yourself, and show appreciation for yourselves because despite what happened, you need to stop and look back to see how far you have become and you have progressed.
If you feel upset because you feel that your effort seems to betray you, just remember that nothing is wasted under the sun. if you train yourself for a certain position and you don’t get that chance, at least you gained a new skill set that might be useful in the future.
If you feel disappointed because you cannot make the one you love proud of you, just remember that if someone really loves you they will keep loving you no matter what happens, you don’t lose them because you can’t make it while you tried your best. And if you really wanna make them proud, there are a million ways to do that and you just have to figure it out, and maybe by opening your mind and being open to any possibilities, you will find another chance on another day.
In the end, if we can solve each emotion, accept our situation, learn the lesson and move on, we can see the future with hope.
With right attitude, everything will be fine.
Sometimes we have to be thankful for the crisis we have because a lot of things can be learned through crisis and we can move further if we handle them well and take the lesson from them. History proved that every crisis is a turning point from disaster to blessing. like civil war ended slavery and triggered the gilded age also WW2 ended the great depression and triggered the postwar economic boom in the 50s. maybe if you can handle this crisis well you can turn the whole thing around and elevate your life to the next level.
